lol “our detection system can’t tell the difference between you talking on the phone and you singing so we need you to keep the data clean by not singing”
Fuuuuck you.
Amazon: “We encourage expediency in delivery, so please don’t stop to use the restroom. Just piss in this bottle.”
Also Amazon: “We need you to arrive promptly, but also we expect you to work late. The needs of the customers come first!”
Finally, Amazon: “You’re tired, you’re hungry, you desperately need to piss, but we’ve decided the biggest risk to your driving safety is your dramatic rendition of Shake It Off by Taylor Swift, as you try to get your mind off the horror of working this dead end job.”
also stop pissing in bottles, thats weird and disgusting, and no we wont give you more time.
Simply don’t drink and drive™️
simply do not piss anymore, pissing is for nerds and losers
“Also, do you really NEED to sleep?”
If you do, AI will take your jobs!!! Hustle, hustle, hustle!
Human conform to our half thought, low bid robot Overseer.
Amazon’s solution: install another microphone in the car so they can hear that you’re singing instead of having a conversation!!
I love that the solution to their shit detection is to make sure that there is nothing to detect.
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Shit, how can we turn this into an interesting dystopia?
The Mad Max people had it right, there should be way more mohawks and scrap metal body armor going around.
Gimme a flame throwing guitarist chained to the hood!
You rang?
Be the change you wish to see in the world.
The future awaits…
With a guillotine
But that leads to utopia!
Task failed successfully
It is true: “Every utopia starts with the horrible story about how it came from a dystopia.” Or something along those lines.
I dunno if I’d call France a utopia
They removed the guillotine too soon.
The trick is it should never be removed: There will ALWAYS be greedy fucks that don’t care about others.
Yeah. They definitely got a little guillotine-happy towards the end there. They should have just put it away in the back room, and taken it out on parade for special occasions. As a reminder.
Somehow that sounds worse, like the proverb/curse"may you live in interesting times"
“May you live in interesting times” is a double-bladed weapon. Unless you plan on dying shortly.
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start sending off children to fight to the death
Make money bets about what will be the next most depressing news.
Nukes?
Lold
a boring dystopia
interesting phrasing… i wonder if the driver thinks it is “boring”
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reading comprehension fail, apologies.
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Sorry I know somebody already kinda explained it but I’d like to weigh in on the concept. :)
All the cautionary sci-fi warned us dystopia would involve nanotech and cyber arms and robot overlords, flying cars, climate wars, mind-jacking hackers, a realistic meta-universe underlying our reality, militarized corporations, pizza delivery being one of the most dangerous jobs in America…
It seemed insane and over the top.
…Our reality is a “boring dystopia” because we have a lot of those hallmarks of that dystopian worldbuilding, but most advancements in technology aren’t even interesting, mainly because they’re immediately used to let bosses and corpos fill our lives with more dull drudgery and economic downslide.
…Tech is evolving rapidly even though societal advancement as a whole has perceptually stagnated.
It’s like living in 2008 forever, but there’s electric cars now, and computers read your emotions to sell your identity to advertisers and rat you out to your boss.
Computers are faster than ever but they’re used to consume the energy of a small country to generate make-believe speculative gambling currency or ugly monkey bitmaps, and now threaten creatives’ livlihoods or automate the scam industry.
It all boils down to it being harder to make a living and the rich keep adding zeroes to their net worths.
Our world is controlled by people so stupidly evil they make four-color comic-book villains look nuanced. And we don’t even get cool synthwave neon streets or rag-tag resistance cells who (effectively) fight back.
I think we all hoped that by the time it got that bad, we’d have some good folks with nano-augments or “L337 H4X1NG $k!115”…but we’re repeatedly crushed to the sound of our coworkers’ moaning “It is what it is. Ya do what you gotta do.” And we go back to work.
“It is what it is” can go die in a fire.
I’d sure be bored if I couldn’t sing along to songs while alone in a vehicle.
i think i missed the joke, i will show myself out now
No worries, I was just riffing off of your statement. I meant no offense
Hey US, how’s it going?
Jesus fucking christ…
How does that freedom taste?
Tastes like a boot on our necks.
The only way to actually get freedom is to aim at the owner class.
Freedom is the guns they dangle in front of their faces like carrots
It pays for my Healthcare just like the flag on the moon does.
Please don’t bring NASA into this, the space program benefitted the lives of basically everyone on earth in incredible incalculable and calculable ways, from contributing to the peaceful collapse of the Soviet Union to countless technologies developed for it and as a result of it, to the birth of the environmental movement and a massive influx in people going into STEM. The US space program has probably done more for your health than socialized medicine would.
All of which is not to say that America is doing great and it shouldn’t have socialized healthcare, but simply to say, keep our Apollo’s name out of your mouth.
When we eating the rich? I’m pretty hungry.
We should keep mouth movement to a minimum so…chew the rich with your mouth closed.
Maybe we could make a fine paste. Space program style, and just squeeze it into a closed mouth.
Soylent Gold is rich people.
Eat the rich with a straw!
Drink the rich?
I will maliciously comply!
Starved even
Perhaps even peckish.
Positively famished, myself
Set the goddamn table!
After years of this sentiment being passed around online it’s clear that shit isn’t going to happen until we have a military draft/Vietnam War level incident. The pot is boiling too slowly for most of us to jump out. And even if we do try to organize a strike or civil disobedience, the government has gotten good at assasinating leaders that threaten the system.
Well if you’re ordering food… I’d like to order one large Bezos with extra Musk, please. Wait, make that Buffet… no no, Gates. With Branson on half.
I’m sorry, that’s too much mouth movement. You are now on probation.
You dont need to wait for everyone else to say grace, you can start now.
Never. Amazon institutes slavery-like conditions, while people keep taking those jobs voluntarily. The same people then buy into BS propaganda about unions bad, so they don’t even have a union in that voluntarily concentration camp.
Some techies who work from home, or walk dogs for living, or take money from parents, or whatever, then constantly circle-jerk on lemmy/reddit/(formerly)twitter about how they’ll eat the rich. While virtually doing absolutely utterly nothing.
So the answer is never.
[Btw, posting trump bad memes 5 times a day on a platform that probably votes dems 99.9% isn’t doing anything]
You wanna know what it means to be doing something? Read Lenin’s biography.
If you’re not in exile like Snowden, not dead like Navalny, not rotting in prison like Assange, you’re not doing enough.
Only when everyone will be ready to go to jail for their vision of the better tomorrow will they not be able to jail you individually and instead will have to change the system.
So, start a local riot group, prepare for two years, kidnap Bezos, sign him up as an Amazon contractor and with a gun pointed to his head make him work the job for 5 weeks.
In the meantime, I will be living in a functioning developed country with a democratically elected government that has long time ago instituted a minimum wage high enough for you to comfortably live off it. I don’t need to eat the rich. I just wish less people would vote far right.
Just make sure you’re either not driving or somehow learn how to eat without using your mouth.
Boof the rich
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I love how the solution is to cram people into smaller and smaller boxes instead of just I dunno not monitoring your fucking drivers like they’re fucking inmates in a maximum security prison you fascist-lite fucks
Edit: Good on 'em for quitting. Every single member of the population should refuse to work for these pricks until they get the goddamn message that we’re adult fucking humans and we expect to be fucking well treated like it. The fact that some of us have the choice between kowtowing to this or starving is a stain on our society.
Double edit: “I hope you have to drive for Amazon in your retirement” might be a contender for the most horrible thing you could wish on someone in 2024.
You should almost never quit if you expect to be fired. Make them fire you and file for unemployment, then challenge them when they try to get out of it. The government tends to err on the side of the employee in my experience when things are unclear, and “We have a knowledge gap that prevents us from confirming whether or not you were actually violating policy, but you’re fired anyway” is the kind of thing you can feel pretty confident challenging.
Make them fire you and file for unemployment, then challenge them when they try to get out of it.
I do not love the odds of a day laborer out maneuvering their professional claims denial behemoth in a court packed with pro-business Federalist Society flunkies.
Against some mom and pop porter service? Sure. But the odds of beating a company that vast and influential seems low.
Depends on the state. Some states are near impossible to get unemployment in. Others, it’s almost impossible for them to deny you unemployment outside of being violent or stealing from them. Know your state’s unemployment laws and use them to your benefit as best as you can.
My Mom managed to get unemployment in Texas against an oil company by spending about an hour total on the phone over a week.
Bonus was that the incident happened about a week before the Covid lockdown, so not only did she get unemployment, but also got the $600/week Covid unemployment bump.
These drivers are most likely contractors, not employees, so no unemployment.
If the drivers are contractors, wouldn’t this level of surveillance and dictating how they perform their job be a violation of labor law? I thought this level of micro management would indicate that the drivers are employees not contractors.
Correct! Amazon and other delivery companies are absolutely violating labor laws and they’re getting away with it because of regulatory capture.
I thought I just saw the other day that a judge ruled they were employees, not contractors. Let me look…
Okay, it’s a little more complex than that - looks like it was one of their “delivery partners” who decided to unionize, and the NRLB ruled Amazon is a joint employer with the delivery partner company. lol Gift WaPo article for it. I couldn’t find other sources.
not monitoring your fucking drivers like they’re fucking inmates in a maximum security prison you fascist-lite fucks
Weren’t you schooled in the US? Aint this exactly what they trained us for?
OBEY, PERFORM, DON’T ASK QUESTIONS OR ELSE
Weren’t you schooled in the US?
Actually, no. Is that the problem? 😂
Edit: Well, not entirely. Jokes aside, that is a difference I noticed, when I moved here.
a privilege and provides some context.
do you think that your schooling background and employment experience do not have these basic elements present with in “work culture”
do you think that your schooling background and employment experience do not have these basic elements present with in “work culture”
No, I think those elements very much reside in the way I learned to approach work, even growing up in multiple countries as I have. It’s only since I’ve hit a later stage in my career and sat back to assess the health impacts it’s had that I’ve been more willing to sit up and advocate for myself and my colleagues. I think it might have something to do with how aggressive I can be about workers’ rights haha. I recognise though that I’m privileged with a sought-after skill set and so I’m usually pretty insulated from retaliation for that, because I can’t be easily replaced.
Thankfully, my current employer is a firm believer in taking care of their people and treating their employees fairly, which is one of the reasons I’ve stuck around here. The contrast though just makes this kind of shit from larger orgs all the more infuriating, because if my tiny company can treat its employees well with such a comparatively tiny revenue stream, then FAANG can too and they just don’t. Bastards.
we’re adult fucking humans and we expect to be fucking well treated like it
Sounds expensive. You’re going to hurt company profits with that attitude. Five Demerits on your Social Credit Score.
Communist totalitarianism is wonderful and good and as American as apple pie as long as it’s corporations doing it not governments.
I love driving. I’ve had delivery jobs and I really enjoyed them. There is absolutely no fucking way I’m working for anyone that has a fucking camera pointed at me. That is some fucking bullshit. I can’t believe anyone works for that shit hole company and puts up with that garbage. No camera, no microphone. I’ll do my job. If you don’t trust me to do my job, then it’s best for the both of us I’m not there.
I understand needing a job. I’ve been there. Don’t put up with that bullshit, unionize, or find something else. There’s jobs out there much better.
On a side note, If you drove holding the steering wheel with your middle fingers out, what kind of punishment would that be?
I’ve got a camera in my work truck. I hate it but I can’t make this much money anywhere else. I was actually sent for a drug and alcohol test a few weeks ago because I kept dozing off while I was sitting in the truck on break. I passed because I was nice and charming to the young girl giving the test. The only thing I popped on was weed anyway.
The reason I was nodding off in the truck is I was fucking exhausted from making them a shitload of money.
Hey we noticed after 12 hours in the heat you seem tired. Must be drugs.
I passed because I was nice and charming to the young girl giving the test.
I’m confused. Either you passed the urinalysis because there was nothing in your system (except weed, which they apparently don’t care about), or because you somehow convinced the technician to fudge the numbers of a medical test? If it’s the latter then wow, that’s a lot of charisma…
She was just nice. Much younger than me. We had a pleasant conversation and I made her laugh. I pissed in the cup and she came and got it. She said “Hmm one of these lines is pretty high… oh well don’t worry about it you passed.” That was definitely weed because the other drugs I had done recently were either out of by system or they don’t test for anyway. She dumped out the piss and threw the cup in the trash.
When I’m on with charisma I’m really good. Unfortunately this is almost always in professional situations. I’m awkward or drunk at parties, but people fall in love in extended one on one time. Shit’s complicated and my mental health is in the dumpster.
On a side note, If you drove holding the steering wheel with your middle fingers out, what kind of punishment would that be?
Believe it or not, straight to jail.
We have the best deliveries. Because of jail.
This is on a different similar note. I work for a big hardware store that isnt home depot. My job trusts me enough to take home keys to the store, and drive a 10 thousand pound forklift whenever I want, but I have to use the worst safety box opener I’ve ever seen. Makes me so mad because it just doesn’t work half the time.
I think a lot of times this is driven by someone cutting themselves and creating a pile Of paperwork and costing money. Worked for a fast food chain and we had to use a chainmail glove to use a knife for the same reason.
That sounds annoying, but my personal rule is any time I have the opportunity to wear armor like a medieval knight, do it.
It’s 1964, you read this in a short story. You think its funny impossible distopia.
