Waaaaay ahead of ya. Getting next year’s fishing supplies from China now

P

I’ve been seeing Christmas shit in stores since before Halloween I don’t wanna hear any shit this year about the war on Christmas.

If there’s a war on Christmas, it’s fucking winning.

This one is gonna have apples, pears, figs, dates, black and gold raisins, walnuts, almonds, pistachios, cinnamon, wine, honey and rosewater. In dices. So like a mishmash of Ashkenazi and Persian charoset.

And yesss it goes well with dairy in general. I usually have leftovers for breakfast with a splash of cream.

What’s your reasoning there?

Nicotine and smoking tobacco are highly addictive and dangerous and while smoking weed has similar dangers to the lungs, taking it other ways isn’t addictive or dangerous in the ways nicotine is.

I also disapprove of a tobacco ban, but that’s because I smoke. Admittedly, nicotine is a shit drug, though, and if I lose my naughty cigarette on the deck drinking with my besties, that’s okay.

Oh, laugh if you feel like laughing!

Life is too short to worry about what should be done in which vibe.

I find my queer male friends are willing to be intimate while straight male friends are very shut off and rarely open up. Generally. Of course there’s exceptions.

Damn why the police so lucky why can’t I find cool stuff

Once it stops making money.

Yo, learned a new word today, thanks!

Lmao that’ll do it!

And demonstrates why OP coulda used some punctuation

Don’t fucking announce it!! Invite him for some honor then bag the fucker!

Alright, it needs some other punctuation, too, but that’s not so bad.

I’m raising my kids by “if you have anything nice to say, say it” and “if you have anything nice you can do, do it”.

“Best” is subjective in the sense that OP hasn’t said which metric is most important to them

Your shitty suggestion optimizes for being gentle and considerate.

I’ve chosen ease on OP’s part and memorability.

OP, you can build tension over the night by asking to play songs that relate to infidelity. Shaggy’s “Wasn’t Me”, Amy Winehouse’s “You Know I’m No Good”, Carly Rae Jepsen’s “This Kiss”, that kinda thing.

I’m oddly partial to The Outfield’s “Your Love”

Thanksgiving, once everyone is at least 3 drinks deep

This reads fine? It could use some commas but otherwise makes sense

I don’t think Santa = swastika but it is super tiresome when Halloween ends and suddenly there’s Christmas shit everywhere. I know it’s more a factor of capitalism than Christianity, but it even infects the meager Hanukkah end caps we get. There’s frequently products being sold that are clearly just Christmas goods painted blue and white (argh) paraded around as Hanukkah goods. Fuckin blue and white pine tree tchotchkes? C’mon what the fuck is that? Hell, one year I saw “chocolate Maccabes” which were literally just chocolate Santa candies in a different foil.

It’s all expected, it happens every year (though the holiday seems to take up more of the calendar each year), but damn is it tiresome. And don’t get me started on the music!

Oh no no no you don’t get it, I should be the sole arbiter of pain on this website.

Other people can’t do it just meeee

Ah dip there goes my weekend plans

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