• ssj2marx@lemmy.ml
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    5 days ago

    go back in time

    give people real medical advice

    “wash your hands after working with cadavers”

    get drummed out of the profession

    die in an asylum

  • MTK@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    Lol, you can still do that, just call it “the truth that big pharma doesn’t want you to know”

  • tenchiken@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    6 days ago

    “your hot wife obviously is suffering from sexy demons. I need to use my specialized equipment to vigorously purge them from her, once each evening, and sometimes just after lunch…”

    • AFK BRB Chocolate@lemmy.world
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      6 days ago

      That sounds far fetched until you remember that they diagnosed women with hysteria and treated them by giving them orgasms. When the vibrator was invented to treat muscle pain much later, doctors latched onto them for treating hysteria to give their hands a break.

      • BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works
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        5 days ago

        Well in that case

        Merhaba, bugün doktorunuz olacağım. Lütfen eteğinizi kaldırın, iç çamaşırınızı çıkarın ve her zamanki pozisyonu alın.

        • iAvicenna@lemmy.world
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          4 days ago

          well your regular small scale religious cult leader being the main point of contact for every health concern (because they set up shop in a very rural area with a lot of religious conservatism and limited health care). People go to them for all sorts of reasons and when you are a female the general answer is you are infested with demons I can help you personally in my bedroom. It is especially ironic when they go to this person because a female cant get pregnant and then voilà!

  • TheHarpyEagle@lemmy.world
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    4 days ago

    Something about the phrasing “you should do a lot of cocaine about it” really tickles me. I wonder what you call breaking grammar rules for humor like that.

  • sp3tr4l@lemmy.zip
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    5 days ago

    You’ve got a horrible infection and a fever?

    I’ll be right over to slit your veins and let all the bad blood out.

    (In fairness I think bloodletting was mostly out of practice by the time actual telephones existed, but lol joke)

    Maybe a more time period accurate one would be:

    Your foot hurts? You think its from a badly fit shoe. Ok. Ok. Come over tomorrow and we will stick your foot into the wildly overpowered and unshielded x ray scope and we’ll see what can be done.

  • variants@possumpat.io
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    6 days ago

    Sadly you could still do this today and charge insurance in the US as long as people don’t care you’re charging their insurance.

    • CaptnNMorgan@reddthat.com
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      6 days ago

      Unless you’re referring to fake meat like impossible burger, what is wrong with lab grown meat? Does the nutritional value change when cells are cloned or something?

      • BezzelBob@lemmy.world
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        5 days ago

        Most notably the fact that it grows so quickly by utilizing cancer cells, also that this is the exact same scenario as the cigarette epidemic, no one knows what exactly are the side effects since this has never been done before, were trying to paly god without knowing the implications. Also i find it ironic how most people stay away from preservatives and artificial chemicals because “theyre bad and make in a lab” but will happily down man’s attempt at playing god

        • captain_oni@lemmy.world
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          5 days ago

          Where did you heard that? The only sources I’ve been able to find about lab-grown meat being made out of cancerous cells are tik-tok videos.

          All articles I’ve read talk about it being made out of stem cells.

          Not calling you a liar, and you have a point that this is something really new and we do not, in fact, know the long term consequences. But I couldn’t find any reliable source to your claim.

          And since I know the meat industry will do anything in its power to stop lab-grown meat from being a thing, I wouldn’t trust just “rumors”.

          But I guess we should all be a bit skeptical of any claims both for in favor and against.

          • BezzelBob@lemmy.world
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            4 days ago

            You won’t find any scientific papers specifically saying cancer because the only papers (in any industry) are the ones that that owner (the company) can profit from. I don’t think I need to go into how every company for the last 100 years have been doing this.

            The reason they don’t have to specifically say it’s cancer it’s because of a legal loophole. It’s the same reason delta 8 thc can be sold in gas stations but delta 9 is federaly illegal, or how docs can give out percs, oxys, etc but not heroine

            Stem cells aren’t really cells per say, they’re more of a blank canvas that can be turned into whatever cell they want… the issue tho: stem cells are EXPENSIVE. doing some rough math, the average placenta can cost 30-50,000 dollars, which can hold 10-50 million stem cells, an 8-ounce steak roughly contains about 289 million cells. So assuming every since stem cell was successfully turned into meat that would mean an 8oz steak would cost 46,136,100,300,000,000,000 USD. Also this doesn’t take into account growth time. So instead they use cancer cells to try to simulate meat since cancer cells grow 3x faster and with less maintenance, which is saving them an incomprehensible about of money

            At the end of the day, it’s the same legal loophole they use to sell delta 8 in gas stations, while delta 9 is on the same level as heroine