Next up: AI controlled exoskeletons so you can still work when you’re dead.
I’m scared of the future
Nah, give it 38k-ish years or so, I’m sure it will be fine by then.
The company making those had to change their name from “Working Stiffs” after an unfortunate misunderstanding about the nature of their business.
I know this is a joke, but that’s just robots with a flesh body inside for no reason
But you can claim tax breaks for them if you pretend they’re people.
No need fleshy body. Replace the working class with robots. Got it /s
There was a time when this was considered utopia. Replace all workforce with robots, so all humans can just pursue their desires at a leisurely pace, making life hopefully overall more enjoyable.
Working Class: “We want wfh! No more offices!”
Corporate psychos:“Hmmm, we can work with that.”
Working in your sleep sounds like a good way to think you’ve finished your work when in reality you’ve just written some random shit into documents.
I would actually love to work in my sleep if that meant I get to live the rest of my life while awake
Lol they’re not going to do that
yeah I know lol
Every technology that increased productivity could have saved us labor time. Instead, it just increased the profits of the employers.
Are we really going to go from “The Simpsons predicted this” to “Rick and Morty predicted this”? Please let’s not.
huh?
There’s an episode from Rick and Morty where the whole main cast gets their asleep selves to do annoying tasks they don’t want to do while they’re awake, to nefarious consequences.
oh, okay. I was just confused because I’m not sure where I mentioned the simpsons or rick and morty. all good lol
A fight-or-flight triggering high-pitched noise plays every night starting at 21:00
The only way to make it imperceptible to you is to plug yourself into the work server
And if you sleep quiet quit, you’ll be banned from the server for day.
And if you point out that it’s a bit fucked, many of your neighbors will tell you that your employer is actually doing a good thing because they make the noise stop, so stop complaining
Wait, I wanted the Brave New World timeline.
I would have settled for the Brave New World album. Or even just the single
I hate this.
“The company has already raised more than $1 million to develop the headband and is reportedly working with one of the designers of Elon Musk’s Neuralink device.”
Oh good, so there’s a chance you might die from it too.
But it will have a autowork function that will do your dream work for you up until you quit watching it work. Then it will crash you into a parked semi truck. Provides once and for all that you can die in real life if you die in a dream. Patient pending
I sleep 8h a day and have a 40h work week, so I wake up in the morning and am done for the day, right? Right??
My boss makes a dollar and I just a dime, that’s why I sleep on company t… wait…
Drug addicts and insomniacs: hmm, I’m unproductive as usual, yet it feels different
Not another. If this works, I’m actually gonna commit arson so this doesn’t continue to exist.
And if you’d take the blade north to south, they’d find a way to make you work even then. Not being able to escape work even in your sleep is hellish.
Sleep already does that. They’ve researched it and found we make better decisions when we sleep on it. Problem is companies think that’s too slow and have to make decisions in 5 seconds.
Next up: New tech allows bosses to check if employees are working in their lucid dreams or having wild sex
This is absolutely a venture capital scam. The tech isn’t even there for Jetsons style recreational dreaming. No way you can make tech that will extract useful work out of dreamers any time soon.
Has to be a scam. Good on them, though. If private equity firms and venture capitalists have all the money, take em for all you can get.
The tech stimulates a state of lucid dreaming, and the idea here that you can work while you sleep stems from the fact that if you are aware of and in control of your dream, you can choose to work on solving complex problems in them. They’re not actually going to make you work in your sleep or even induce a dream that forces you to dream about working. Merely giving you a lucid dream and letting you control what happens.
I wouldn’t be working. I’d be exploring space and time… And riding dinosaurs.
“Sorry I didn’t get anything done last night, boss. That thing was happening where I can’t move my limbs in my dream.”
