Love this post! You have such a fun playful style of writing and it’s a style that I never see on like, reddit for instance. Emojis are really looked down on there and language is expected to be pretty standardized. I love how much fun u have w it :3

Thanks for sharing your story! :) My partner was binary trans for years before they came out as nonbinary, which far more matches their identity.

I myself thought that binary trans was the only option when I was in high school so I pushed that egg deep down down down until my early 30s when it cracked open. When I first was thinking about transitioning, the idea of fully going fem just didn’t feel right for me. I feel so grateful to live in a s o c i e t y where it’s more welcomed than in the past.

Tru

This is wonderful, though I feel like “I don’t feel super comfortable in my body” as a pre-cursor to nonbinary identity is a narrow view. I didn’t experience much gender dysphoria before transitioning, but I experience a hell of a lot of gender euphoria when exploring my nb side.

It must have been so much more difficult to engage in relationships like this back then. It truly was revolutionary, to go up against everyone in your life and society to follow your heart.

I’m navigating this with my partners right now.

I’ve decided to go barrier-free with my two partners, and use condoms with everyone else.

We are a pretty incestuous polycule and mostly use barriers with those outside the friend group, and we’re all tested frequently. ~3 months.

Me and one of my partners also take daily doses of PrEP, which nearly eliminates the risk of contracting hiv. I’m also fully vaccinated, so the only thing I could potentially get that can’t be eliminated with drugs is herpes, but that is very treatable.

It’s an awesome feeling to come to accept! I know many trans individuals who started off going hard binary trans, and then settling on something more in the genderfluid or nonbinary spectrum. I think it feels more right for some people to go full binary trans in the beginning in situations in which they have a part of themselves that has been heavily repressed by society. After they’ve “got it out of their system” so to speak, some people realize that they’re actually not always one or the other gender.

It’s an experience that some relate to and some don’t. Congratulations on coming to a deeper understanding of yourself! <3

I’d fuck that dog

I’m NB but I’ve been on hormones for almost 2 years and have definitely changed a lot while working for my current company. I’ve been with the company from when it was a 15 person startup to being a 200 person entrenched behemoth, and it’s pretty much been a great experience all the way. Granted, almost no-one uses my pronouns(Maybe 2 or 3 people in the company), however they are listed in my Slack profile, I have only ever verbally told my team them a single time, and I haven’t pushed since then. The more important thing to me is that I’m seen as a human being, which I feel like I am. My co-workers for sure think I’m weird(for many reasons), but they also accept me and appreciate my weirdness, even celebrating it in some cases.

I think it’s as good as can be expected. Just the fact that the company loosely encourages employees to list pronouns in their Slack profile is a big win for me.

Thank you for the response! I intend to continue donating as I participate in the community over time.

HAHA gdi

Donated! Would be willing to share what the current monthly costs look like?

Also a huge fan of The Ethical Slut!

I liked it a lot better than Polysecure, which was more psychology than polyamory. Also not as huge of a fan of Sex at Dawn, which was more like anthropology than actionable poly material, though it’s good for what it is.

Like Indomora said, it seems like you and your partner want different things.

If you don’t want to break up, I would suggest telling your partner how important this is to you.

She says that she’d be more open to it when you’re both more secure. Okay, then try finding pre-defined times in the future that you both can agree on to discuss this further. That will make this less of a fantasy, and more measurable.

Good luck