So, to get this out of the way, I’m a cisgender white man from a well-off family in a fairly affluent town. I’m making this post because I want to hear perspectives from those who are different from and likely significantly more knowledgeable than me. (Literally as I was writing this post, I came to the epiphany that I should probably more properly educate myself on socialism.)

TL;DR: What is your opinion on giving money to houseless people you see IRL?

I like to consider myself socialist/progressive in thought—in favor of wealth redistribution via various methods, live and let live, freedom for everyone as long as you’re not materially harming anyone, etc.—but I grew up in a fairly conservative household (more socially than fiscally, but even then). Being in a rich area, I never really saw houseless people around unless I went to one of the nearby cities, and the general policy was keep walking and don’t look. My parents definitely raised me to be kind and generous, but more in a detached “give to charity” way.

Rather recently, I’ve really embraced this idea of being socialist, and I’ve become very free with giving my money in particular (though I’m aware I could do more, like join a DSA branch or somethin’). I love giving to non-profit organizations when I can, I support creators I like on Patreon. I’ve even started giving to people on Fedi who I’ve seen need money for whatever reason. Spread the wealth, right?

Now, things have changed where I live, and even in my rich lil burb, you can usually find at least one refugee or houseless person when you go out to a grocery store or something. I just saw a guy who was standing outside a grocery store asking for spare change, and it was a rare occasion that I actually had cash in my wallet. On my way out, I gave it to him. Simple.

But I feel weird about it. I have all these ideas in my head from White America saying that they’ll just buy alcohol or drugs with it or that they’re scamming me or anything else like that. Then on the other hand, I think that it’s just as likely (if not more) that they’re going to spend it on things they actually need to live and how it’s not my job to police how they use their money. And then on the third hand, I think that maybe it would be better to donate money to organizations that help out houseless people than just giving money to random people. Then on the fourth hand—you get the idea.

For those of you who actually read the whole post and didn’t stop at the TL;DR, I have a few questions:

  1. Why in God’s name did you actually read this whole thing?
  2. Are these feelings normal or am I just a self-centered prick?
  3. What are your opinions on giving money to houseless people you just randomly meet?
  4. As a bonus question for the socialists out there: Any recs on socialism learning resources for someone who likes reading, but doesn’t like reading books?

For those of you who made it all the way to the end, thank you for reading my neurotic ramblings.


EDIT: I didn’t really expect this to blow up… but thank you all so much for your perspectives on everything. It was exactly what I was hoping for and exactly what I didn’t think I was going to get. I tried to read everything and I feel simultaneously less conflicted, but definitely more… not confused, but maybe full of ideas?

  • hazel 🤷🏻‍♀️🏳️‍🌈@beehaw.org
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    1 year ago

    I have a pretty similar background except I’m a trans woman and for the past decade I’ve lived and schooled and worked in a downtown area - about 80k population in the city.

    My instinct used to be they will use it for drugs or are a grifter, many years ago. My current position is, if I have the money to spare then I should help with absolute disregard for my old thought patterns. If there is a chance this human won’t be able to eat today, and I have a chance to help, then I will try, though I almost never have cash. I will offer to buy them a meal if near a restaurant.

    Today my roommate and I were coming home from urgent care and they keep a package of bottled water in the car, and we had picked up food, so we offered a burger and two bottles of water and the person was grateful.

    I am autistic and fwiw my therapist’s take is that especially in big cities they are basically all grifters playing the tourists and to ignore them. I don’t know what I think about that, but he would know a lot more than me.

    Edit to add: I could not care less anymore what they use the money for. If there was a comprehensive functional model for helping people get off the street who want off, I’d feel differently, but then this would be an entirely different convo.

    • M. Orange@beehaw.orgOP
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      1 year ago

      Yeah, I live in close proximity to a few big cities, and while I’m of the opinion/hope that a majority of houseless people/beggars are scam artists just looking for their next hit, the evidence I’ve seen walking when I’m through those cities can look fairly damning sometimes.

      Your perspective is one I was hoping to see: someone with a similar background to me but who has gotten past their biases. It definitely helps.

      • Let me ask you, how do you feel when someone asks and you say no / apologize / walk by?

        I feel like a shit human. I still do it at times out of discomfort and internalized biases I still struggle with, but it never feels right or good.

        A little over a year ago I transitioned to working in a gov-funded mental health and substance abuse integrated serbice provider (it’s a mouthful), we have four various buildings around the city. Of course we take all sorts of trainings on bias, trauma, social determinants of health, and homelessness is a big problem in our city so we talk about that a lot. That definitely played a part in deconstructing my past ideas.

        I was homeschooled until college with my eight siblings because public schools bad and religious indoctrination good. As soon as I started experiencing the actual, real world, I had to deconstruct EVERYTHING, and a decade later I’m still reconstructing. This all played a HUGE part in my beliefs before and after. I grew up watching/listening to and respecting Sean Hannity and Bill O’Reilly and all them, and now my dad is into Matt Walsh, Ben Shapiro et al.

        Sorry, I’m just going on about nothing now. But consider how your beliefs/perceptions developed in the first place and it might help / provide clarity.