• @Zoop@beehaw.org
    link
    fedilink
    English
    37
    edit-2
    26 days ago

    I didn’t know it was possible for me to love the Hard Times even more! This is fantastic. I especially love these bits:

    At this moment Steve starts singing ‘here’s my fist it never fails, when I swing it really sails, when it strikes I want to wail, dieeeeee!!!’ and then he just starts bashing in Dan’s skull

    and

    At press time, it was reported that a spotted blue puppy was seen in LA carrying around the decapitated head of convicted pedophile and former Nickelodeon employee Brian Peck.

    Fuck, I just love it so much. Beautiful! Thanks for posting this here, ZeroCool!

    • @wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.com
      link
      fedilink
      English
      6826 days ago

      It’s pretty much an “open secret” that he’s a pedophile who abused a number of the female stars of Nickelodeon shows.

      This is a vine from one of his former stars. I don’t see any way to interpret that except as a cry for help with the thinnest fucking veneer of hiding behind comedy.

      Beyond that, of what I understand to be the openly verifiable stuff, he’s openly a sex pest with a foot fetish as he has had a number of incredibly out of place scenes involving shots of underage female stars feet in the shows he has overseen, and he also tried to start a trend of getting (mostly underage) fans of his shows to write messages on their feet and post the pictures to twitter. I think it was “supposed” to be some sort of campaign to bring a show back?

      Man is at absolute best a disgusting fucking creep preying on the underage for his foot fetish. Tons of circumstantial evidence that he’s much much worse than that.

      • Davel23
        link
        fedilink
        1126 days ago

        No, I know all that, I was referring to the picture. He’s looking rough.

        • @Kiosade@lemmy.ca
          link
          fedilink
          English
          1126 days ago

          I mean he’s been fat most of his life and he’s pushing 60. But yeah his lips look weird with that beard

      • @melpomenesclevage@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        English
        826 days ago

        its possible to have a foot fetish without being a creep about it. let’s not kink shame the pedophile rapist sex pest.

        • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet
          link
          fedilink
          English
          926 days ago

          its possible to have a foot fetish without being a creep about it.

          Although that’s a perfectly innocent fetish under normal circumstances, it is not Innocent when he’s getting sexual gratification from minors without their knowledge. That’s creepy as fuck. Nobody would care if he was attracted to the feet of consenting adults.

  • @moistclump@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    2326 days ago

    “If there’s one thing I always wanted to teach the kids who watched ‘Blues Clues’ it’s that you have to be ready to do the right thing,” said Steve from behind the glass in the local jail. “That’s why after watching the ‘Quiet on Set’ documentary I knew I had to take action. I followed all of the clues before sitting down in my thinking chair and thinking about what to do. I soon realized that abused children, Dan Schneider, and my fists all added up to justified vigilante justice. My dog might be blue but I vowed my hands would be magenta after I was done with him.”

  • ArugulaZ
    link
    fedilink
    426 days ago

    “You’ve gone to the DEAD of the Class! Say hi to Howard Hesseman for me!”
    (audience hoots and cheers wildly)

  • ivanafterall
    link
    fedilink
    226 days ago

    Elvis is dead. Tupac is dead. Steve from Blue’s Clues is dead. Let it go. I’m sick of his denials by now.

  • KillingTimeItself
    link
    fedilink
    English
    226 days ago

    is that, anthony fantano, the notorious music review guy?

    I don’t remember steve looking like that.

    • @Ozymati@lemmy.nz
      link
      fedilink
      English
      426 days ago

      No, he just went to college. Although it is possible he was replaced with a liberal doppleganger while there.

    • @ZeroCoolOP
      link
      English
      80
      edit-2
      26 days ago

      “hands would be magenta” my guy you probably shoulda googled that word before committing to it.

      Magenta is a purple-ish red color which on it’s own doesn’t really work as a reference to blood, but the author chose that specific color because it’s also the name of Blue’s friend next door, a dog named Magenta.

      https://bluesclues.fandom.com/wiki/Magenta

      Perhaps you should’ve googled that before committing to your comment?

      • @DarkNightoftheSoul@mander.xyz
        link
        fedilink
        English
        -3
        edit-2
        26 days ago

        On a second, more careful review of that wikipedia page:

        I thank you for being the only person to actually address and correct my mistake. While the color I was brought up to understand as magenta and the color of the flower I got when I googled “magenta” and the color of the relevant dog (if you squint, maybe) do not look like any bruise or blood, the color can be fairly said to take up more space in the color wheel than that, and potentially includes many “bruised” colors.